hug me until i smell like you
Sad aesthetic & thinspo
Cw: 145 lbs gw: 127 ugw: 100 height: 5’7
Imagine
🔹 Wearing even the simplest of outfits like a white t-shirt with blue jeans and still looking really good and put together because you’re skinny
🔹 Having cold hands when everybody else is sweating
🔹 Confidently asking for the smallest size in shops, knowing it will fit
🔹 Looking better in photos thanks to your confident smile and gorgeous body
🔹Your thighs with no extra flabbiness on them
🔹 People commenting on your weightloss
🔹 Taking progress photos and feeling proud
🔹 Looking forward to bikini season instead of dreading it
“8:13 am it’s early september. you roll over and slide out of your warm sheets, opening the curtains to a cool and bright day. you push open the window, allowing the fresh air to whisk away the remnants of last nights slumber. in nothing but a lacy bralet, underwear and a large oversized tshirt, you glance at yourself in the mirror as make your way out of your bedroom. your legs are dainty and thin - like the ballet dancer that you are, or easily could be, if you wanted. there is the remnants of the summer left on your silky smooth skin (thank you moisturiser). you’re glowing. you lift your tshirt and run your bony hands along your abdomen, your stomach is wafer thin, your hip bones jutting out delicately. you drop your tshirt and examine your face. you have a slim, swanlike neck, a model jawline, and those chubby cheeks you were known for? gone. your skin is clearer than it’s ever been; weeks of no junk food has paid off. you feel, and look, beautiful. pushing your thick framed glasses onto your nose and running your fingers through your tousled, shoulder length hair, you smile. 8:29 am as you step onto the scales, your heart flutters as it reads your weight. 90lbs. you’ve done it. victory.”
you’re standing at the open fridge in turmoil, unable to choose. will you eat a grapefruit with breakfast, or have raspberries with strawberries in a little bowl? you finally settle on the sweet red fruits, and glide across your tiny kitchen to rinse them so you can begin slicing the strawberries in half. it’s a good thing you eat so well and so little because your apartment is on the smaller side, leaving little room for clutter and garbage such as fatty chips, greasy cookies, and other calorie stuffed snacks. your slim fingers wrapped around the knife, you expertly cut up your breakfast and slip it into a clear crystal bowl before practically floating to the coffee pot and pouring yourself a steaming cup of black coffee. you barely even want to sweeten it a bit with stevia anymore, you’ve learned to love the delicious bitterness of the pure coffee. you alternate between dainty sips and tiny bites as you sit by your window and watch the city wake up. every day has felt fresh and beautiful after reaching your ugw. there are so many possibilities, so many people and stories and worlds waiting to be discovered by you now. it’s time for you to explore.
It’s a chilly autumn Friday night. You’re walking to a house party with your friends, your converse crunching on leaves as you float weightlessly down the sidewalk. You’re walking in the middle instead of trailing behind like you used to. Now you’re always in the middle.
You’re dressed in jeans - the faded ones with the rips that you bought years ago in hopes that you’d eventually be able to fit into them, a loose sweater that shows off your newly defined collarbones, and a light jacket whose sleeves hang loosely around your dainty wrists. Your hands are decorated with the rings you just bought, accentuating the slenderness of your fingers.
As you near the party, you hear faint music and see lights coming from down the street. When you reach the house, your friends walk to the backyard and find a fire pit. Around it are some of your guy friends and a few empty seats - but not enough for all of you.
One of your friends says you’re so tiny that you can just sit on her lap. Words you never thought you’d hear. You never thought you’d be singled out as the skinny friend, let alone considered anything other than the fat friend.
You sit on her lap, which everyone thinks is funny, and you take a sip from the crumpled water bottle of vodka-lemonade you’d been holding in the back of your jeans on the walk over. You’ve barely had a few sips, but you’re already feeling buzzed. You aren’t used to being such a lightweight. It reminds you of how far you’ve come.
Across the fire pit is a guy you’ve never met before. He has dark brown hair and big brown eyes. He’s cute, but doesn’t seem like the type to recognize it. One of your guy friends introduces him to everyone. They lived in the same hall freshman year.
Everyone says their names around the circle, and the friend you’re sitting on makes a comment about how cute he is. You agree casually, not wanting to get your hopes up for when he doesn’t end up being interested in you.
But not this time. This time it’s different. This time, his eyes linger on you as the topic of conversation changes. You make eye contact and take another sip of your drink, a pleasant warmth spreading through your body. You bury your hands in the sleeves of your jacket and hug your arms around your waist to keep warm. He looks down at his drink, trying to hide a smile.
This time, the guy noticed you. Not your skinnier, prettier friend. You. Because now you are the thinnest, prettiest one. You finally gathered the strength to become the best version of you, and now it’s paying off.
You did it.